Life is unpredictable. So hauntingly true. Especially after Xu Weilun's death. I need to blog about this. Need to get this off my chest.

No one seems to understand why am I feeling this way. Maybe even I don't know the reason.

For those who knows me or have used my computer before, knows that my home page is a chinese page, which is actually PChome. Where I can get news update on the taiwanese entertainment scene. Saturday night. 27th Jan 2007. I was at my home page and the name Xu Weilun caught my eye. Without reading the title of the news. I just clicked in. The content of the news truly shocked me. Xu Weilun in a coma after a serious car accident. I was shocked. Thought it was some joke or probably some publicity stint for her new show or something. But no. It's not. I teared.

Seriously, I cannot say that I'm a fan of hers. But when I first set my eyes on her, I felt that she was really pretty and would pay attention to her news. But I wouldn't like chase all her shows, though I would pay attention to her if I happen to see her shows or something. And a super plus point was that I loved the show she acted with He Junxiang. Express Boy. Because of this, I watched many of her clips on youtube and happened to favourite a few of those.

I was still hoping and praying for a miracle to happen. That she will wake up and let this just be a terrible nightmare. But, life never goes according to what we wish for most of the time. Sunday, 28th Jan 2007. I was back in hall and the first thing I did when I on my laptop was to update myself on her injury status. Whether is she getting better. Little did I expect that all I would read about is the news of her death. All I can say is that I was stunned. I finally understood the feeling of when you heard very bad news, you don't usually start crying immediately. You'll actually go into a state of shock first. Ok, for me, it wasn't shock. It was more of disbelief. For the rest of the night, my mood was low. And I would whine to people and sigh that she died. Of course I would also use the traditional way of not thinking about something. That is to make myself watch my current obsession, Nicholas Tse's videos.

I wasn't in the mood to study. So today, I was a bad girl. I skipped a lecture and a tutorial and slept my day away. And when I went for the last lect, I think my friends could tell that I was not my usual self. When I got back from the lecture, I went on to read about her news again. Reading about her parents crying, her good friends mourning proved too much to handle. I cried today. Not those weeping ones, but tears just uncontrollably rolled down. I really down. And I can't seem to find someone who would understand. I don't dare to watch those videos of her that I favourited on youtube. I knew I would not be able to take it. I was just contemplating whether I should re-watch Express Boy on Saturday before I read the news. Now I wouldn't want to. At least not so soon. I'll cry.

I'm not her fan. But I miss her already. Her smiles especially. My neighbour just walked in and commented that I looked tired. Physically, no. Since I slept my day away. Emotionally, yes. Of course, I wouldn't stop smiling and laughing, but I can't help but think about her. And I would continue to read about her funeral and other news. A young lady, with a bright future ahead of her, gone, in a matter of days. Life is so unpredicatable and fragile. We really need to learn to appreciate whatever we have now. It's never to early to tell your loved one that you love them.

So here's to all my loved ones. I LOVE YOU!

I just had to dedicate this post to my beloved e4. After reading all the other blogs, I was really touched. I guess, we all have the same sentiments.

e4 was formed at Bishan Junction 8 in the year 2004. Short for Evil 4, we clicked together because of our love for 5566. Why evil 4 u might ask. Cause we pass time during the long hours queue-ing up to see our idols, by laughing at other people and being the noisiest ones around. Yes, we do bitch about people and we find "pleasure" in that. That's why we're evil.

We, being evil, have ranked ourselves in e4. Our president, the most evil one, is Samantha. And I, am the vice-president. Shuyi is, I think, our HR manager or something. And Peishan was our secretary, but was later demoted to toilet cleaner and still is the toilet cleaner. Haha. So from this order, you can see the level of evilness in each of us.

Why did I mention all these above? Cause e4 is special. How special? Very special. We knew each other through our love for 5566. Usually these kind of friendships don't last. They would usually disappear as the love for the idol disappears. But not in the case of e4. We are no longer interested in 5566. But we still meet up and chat. And most importantly, we have fun. Not an awkward gathering. e4 has met up for many reasons. Christmas, where we went to Sam's hall to have steamboat and exchanged gifts. Birthdays, Shuyi's 21st birthday, and of the recent celebration of PS's birthday and also the joint birthday celebration we had for Shuyi and Samantha last October at my house. We even celebrate the e4 anniversary! Haha. Of course, many more, which I cannot remember at the moment. My memory is failing me.

I would dare say that not all friendships are like that. For me, I'm probably closer to e4 then to my primary school classmates. Even secondary or JC. Why? Cause, when we haven't met in a while, I would have the urge to want to arrange an outing with e4 and meet them. No such urge to meet my classmates though. I don't know. e4 is really very special to me. I really thank fate for letting me meet such wonderful people. Maybe to others, after reading this post, still do not think that there is anything special about our friendship. But all I can say is, you won't truly understand unless you experience it yourself. An analogy. Most of us worked part time during the holidays before. But are you so close to them such that you still chat with them, and meet up with them. If yes, then you'll probably understand as the friendship forged is of the same type. If no, which is think is the more likely answer, then I'll tell you, it's hard to find friendships like that.

To end it all.

e4, I LOVE YOU! You guys will always have a place in my heart and I'm really glad to have know you guys. Hope this friendship will continue and last on and on so that we can celebrate our 20th anniversary and even more! e4, the greatest! :)

Ok ok, I'm sorry again for not blogging. I think I've lost most of my readers anyway. Haha. Pushed by Shuyi to blog. So here I am, blogging about the e4 meeting that we had recently.

e4 strikes back with another meeting to celebrate PS's belated birthday last Sunday. First time in e4 history that everyone including the always early Peishan is late. Ok, I wasn't late. I was in fact the earliest. :) Guess what e4 meet up for? Of course our favourite activity! Kbox!! Haha. I don't know if it was because I too long never go Kbox-ing or Shuyi is sick of Kbox. The both of us reached there first but we were waiting for each other to pick the first song. Haha. And also my first time singing Ah-mei's song, Wo Wu Suo Wei. So PS and shuyi, you guys got the honour to hear me sing it. Haha. What fun is Kbox without some fun and laughter? So leave it to the VP and Pres of e4 to entertain everyone. So Sam and I started our pea war and camera snatching game. Haha. Secret : its actually a ploy. Cause we were to cold! Need to move around. Haha. And of course, lots of pictures were taken. What's an e4 gathering with no camera?

After Kbox would be our Sakura buffet dinner. Shark fin soup and sashimi and sushi and many many more!! Really full. But I don't think any of us ate our worth, we ain't big eaters. But we really had fun. Eating. Laughing. And last but not least, to digest, we started to take silly photos. Haha. And I really mean silly. So UGLY!!! Haha. And all of us, except Sam, had new nicknames. Shuyi was Flasher Lao Da Jie, PS was Chun Qing Xiao Bai Tu. And guess what's mine? Feng Sao Char Shao Bao! My god. And the truth. I thought of the name myself. Haha.

Thats all I guess. I'm still lazy. So for photos, go to my links and read the other e4 members' blog to see the photos. Till the next post. Ciao!